Giving Thanks. (Breast Cancer & a Grandmother’s Love)

Naomi Mills Williams, Wedding Day 9/23/1961
Naomi Mills Williams, Wedding Day 9/23/1961

So for all intents and purposes, today’s my day, right? Today’s the day I give thanks for the blessing of living another year with sound mind, body and soul. Looking back on a life that’s been full of blessings (derivatives of the good and bad experiences), I think of the woman who gave generously of herself so her grandchildren would have most of what they wanted and all of what they needed. Naomi Mills Williams, Grandma, was the love of her grandson’s life; and as a result, she laid the foundation for the man he is today. Grandma began me on my journey of understanding life’s lessons. Her physical influence ceased when she left this world on October 15, 1984; just 3 days before the 18th birthday of the grandson who idolized her. This was one of the most important lessons in my life.

As we all progress through life we experience lessons meant to direct us to our ultimate purpose. Sometimes we get it and are able to move on, sometimes we fight it and are forced to eventually repeat it – naturally that depends on how long we run from it. In the end, if we hold true to our life’s goal, we’ll learn the lesson and move to the next step.

Thanks to the lessons taught, and learned, at an early age, life has been more fruitful than sour; more thankful than sorrow-filled; more plentiful than barren. For that I give thanks to the Creator…PBUH.Are there regrets? No, for each act was a lesson of itself or in the making. Could things have turned out differently? No, they’ve progressed as the Master intended. Should some lessons have been learned sooner? Well that would contradict the first two statements, right?

There are many things to be thankful of.

God. I THANK GOD. Thank Him for the miracle of life, whose inception was 9:30am on Tuesday, October 18, 1966. Nothing more really needs to be said, but why not testify, right? I thank Him for saving me. I thank Him for being the light on my journey. I thank Him for the opportunity to choose my parents. I thank Him for the continual ability to hear, touch, see and speak. I give praise for the blessing of life. I give praise for being. Being a child, a brother, a father, a friend and any positive image I’ve had the opportunity to be during these years. I THANK GOD.

Family. I thank God for my sons – for in them I see me “reincarnated,” but for the purpose of a different destiny. I thank God for my wife – for in our union, I see the spirit of personal and collaborative growth as it was meant to be. I thank God for my stepson – for in him I see the opportunity to do what I missed before. I thank God for my mother – for she was the example of what hard work and sacrifice means. I thank God for my sisters – for they each have shown the way to the path of “right-eousness.” I thank God for my nieces and nephews – for they have continually reminded me of the sacrifice one makes to keep a family together. I thank God for my Uncle Tommy – for he was a constant reminder of what a “Man” is to be. I thank God for my extended family (Grand Aunt(s) and cousins) – for they are the connection to our past and the future.

Friends. I thank God for my best friend FOREVER Leloni – for she has provided an un-opinionated, supportive and guiding conscious for over 25 years. I thank God for my friend Tanya – for she has and continues to help keep an ego grounded. I thank God for my friend Eric – for he has shown the strength men are to possess as we move through this world (congratulations on your nuptials). I thank God for my friend Jamila – for she has shown how the spirit of friendship can be nurtured in different ways. I thank those who remain nameless – for our bond was meant to prepare me for the future.

Life. I thank God for being a “native New Yorker” – Brooklyn baby. I thank God for P.S. 306. I thank God for us moving to Baltimore. I thank God for the teasing when I arrived at Pimlico Elementary. I thank God for allowing me to get caught shoplifting on my 11th birthday. I thank God for Greenspring Jr. High. I thank God for City College High School. I thank God for B.S.A. Troop 138. I thank God for Southwestern High School. I thank God for the Gilman High School parties and O’dell’s. I thank God for Frostburg State College/University. I thank God for the “Mustard Seed” (WOW!). I thank God for Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. – for you have shown me how to spread my wings. I thank God for the Marine recruiter who insisted I enlist instead of attending Officers Candidate School. I thank God for University of Baltimore. I thank God for Club Fantasy. I thank God for “The Bones.” I thank God for Paradox. I thank God for Wayne Davis – a true entrepreneurial inspiration. I thank God for Sinical/Nuclheaz Records. I thank God for Kevin Liles (early Def Jam days) and his words that helped provide focus. I thank God for Frank “Ski” for all of his experiences, [added->] and the DRINK in South America (LOL). I thank God for Anthony “Miss Tony” Boston. I thank God for Unruly Records (Shawn and Scottie). I thank God for being unfairly fired from Kinko’s. I thank God for the ability to be a graphic designer. I thank God for Aquent (especially Nancy and Lee). I thank God for the opportunity to visit Cameroon – for it allowed me to refocus on what’s important in life.

People. I thank God for Mr. Strodman. Tyrone Hall. Mr. Baublis. Mr. Bullock. Vernon Joines. Mrs. Brown. John Brown. Bernest Stokeling. Rev. PM Smith. Lloyd Alston. Latreece Perry. Lark Ball Cooper. Mrs. Phillips. Mrs. Dunn (City College). Dr. Solomon Lausch. Damon Vinson. The guys from Westport/Mt. Winans who terrorized me – you built my resilience. My former neighbor Jada Pinkett – you let me know “I was.” Ultra Nate – friends always. Dj Oji. Crystal Waters. Richard Payton. Doug Smith. Bro. Jay Johnson for the words that lit my path in a time of uncertainty…you’ve been an inspiration. Bro. Darren M. Morton for providing the opportunities to “clear my head” and be vulnerable. Bro. Al Lucas for being the insightful advisor. Kiva Harris Slade – thanks for always being there. Alex Delotch Davis. A. Nicole Williams. Renee Shanks. Bro. Tim McFadden. Bro. Ralph Johnson. Bro. Hilton Friend. Bro. Dr. Clayton Stansbury. Bro. Billy Mithcell. Bro. Darryl R. Matthews. Bro. Willard Hall. Bro. Dennis G. Kemp, Sr., PMP (*smile*). Edwin Avent. Robert Stephens. Tovi Lynn Smith (THANKS!). Tracy Jackson (where are you?). James Parker. Benita Robinson Lance. Marita Araujo. Charyn Henrice Cade. Chris “Mugsy” Johnson. Bradford “Rusty” Cunningham. James “Dean Rock Diamond” Gowen. Marcus “The Saint” Hairston. Albert “Wooza” Perrine, Jr. David Arthur. Tania Brown. Tanya Snow (we’ll always be friends). Karen Trent. Colleen Peterson. Maisha Hoye. Atiya Hoye. The Panthers Flag Football team. Amy Smith. Sherrell Tombs. Desiree Hall. Raelene Scott. Mrs. Pansye Atkinson. Latende Kersey. Charlene Hughes. James Smith. FSU Delta Gents (1984 – 1988). Ray Toppins. Tijuana Franklin. Karen Holmes. Darrin Ebron. Keith Hinnant. Cowpoke. Judson Kerr. Russell Clark. Christopher Clark. The maintenance man that helped me avoid eviction in 1992. Akilah Clarke. Charles Dockins. Kristy Herring. Residents of Foumban, Cameroon (especially Patrick Ndayou). Mary Pat Clarke. Leah Daughtry. Kevin Parker. LaToia Jones. Tyrone Taborn. Raymond Haysbert. Ramona “Lele” Debreaux (thanks for keeping a brother encouraged). Darryl Wharton. Dale Madison. Jan Collins. Jay Hunter. Tamara Hamilton. Selwyn Ray. My “DDD” students/mentees (Demitrius, Collin, Odell, Latreece, Keonte, Akhil and 19 more) – you all made me “cool.” Bluford Drew Jemison Academy. Karma.

The many people and experiences are massive and will have to be updated as time goes on, but one thing’s for certain…there’s much I’ll be continually thankful of – such as my Grandma teaching me the 2-step. There are many I’m continually thankful for – such as Grandma seeing her only grandson enter into college. In the end, all of this is about living life to the fullest – enjoying the pleasant times…and learning from the sour times.

Absolution is sought from those who have been offended or suffered misdeeds at my doing. These, too, were lessons in life, and unbeknownst to you, you were a teacher. These lessons have created the “me” you know today. One who has transcended to a life of benevolence, compassion, consideration, determination, empathy, fortitude, generosity, hope, munificence, optimism, philanthropy and selflessness. Grandma would be proud that the self-proclaimed “ugly duckling” has grown to a self-confident, determined individual who understands “beauty” and “sexy” exude from within.

Life is meant to be lived. My Grandma would be proud.